Tuesday, December 15, 2009
Saturday, December 5, 2009
Wednesday, November 25, 2009
Wednesday, November 18, 2009
Saturday, November 14, 2009
Tuesday, November 10, 2009
Wednesday, November 4, 2009
Saturday, October 31, 2009
I have been discouraged, (as I am sure we all get sometimes) even amongst the glory of victory. I went to the doctor and low and behold my weight loss for the month of October is 10 pounds! I know I should be happy with this...10 pounds is really no small feat. But I will be honest in saying I do not feel excited. I just feel like my energy pulling me toward the bed. I don't want to do ANYTHING...
I spoke to my honey for a few moments and it was magical...as always. He is peace for me...joy amidst an unjoyous existence. I love hearing his voice and even if the entire day has been turbulent, once he enters via phone call or delivers himself to my door, I am elated as thought a leprochan delivered gold to my door or the mega million guy is waiting outside with my check. He brings me THAT much joy.
One of the things I want to regain is my sexual prowess. The extra weight has depleted my ability to own my sexual ability. He gives me UNBELIEVABLE love-making. I want to be able to give it back. It's like the me inside wants to give him the best of myself and the weight tires me out. I am determined to lose the weight. I want to be in control of how I make love to him, just as he controls how he makes love to me.
Tomorrow my son will be going with his dad, and I think I will be going to the gym tomorrow. I believe that I will use my man as the determination for going to the gym. When I have reached my goal I am gonna SO put it on him! LOL!!!
Cook Time: 3 Hours Ready In: 11 Hours 30 Minutes
"These ribs require a double cooking process and an overnight bath in a marinade. The spicy rub and rich sauce make them worth the wait!"
4 pounds baby back ribs
4 cloves garlic, sliced
1 tablespoon white sugar (I chose to omit this)
1 tablespoon paprika
2 teaspoons salt
2 teaspoons ground black pepper
2 teaspoons chili powder
2 teaspoons ground cumin
1/2 cup dark brown sugar 1/2 cup cider vinegar
1/2 cup ketchup
1/4 cup chili sauce
1/4 cup Worcestershire sauce
1 tablespoon lemon juice
2 tablespoons onion, chopped
1/2 teaspoon dry mustard
1 clove crushed garlic
1. Preheat oven to 300 degrees F (150 degrees C). Place ribs on a rack in a shallow roasting pan. Scatter 4 cloves of sliced garlic over ribs. Cover, and bake for 2 1/2 hours. Cool slightly.
2. In a small bowl, mix together white sugar, paprika, salt, black pepper, chili powder, and ground cumin. Rub spices over cooled ribs. Cover, and refrigerate overnight.
3. In a small saucepan, mix together brown sugar, cider vinegar, ketchup, chili sauce, Worcestershire sauce, lemon juice, onion, dry mustard, and 1 clove garlic. Simmer over medium-low heat, uncovered, for 1 hour. Reserve a small amount for basting; the remainder is a dipping sauce.
4. Preheat grill for medium heat.
5. Place ribs on grill. Grill, covered, for about 12 minutes, basting with the reserved sauce, until nicely browned and glazed. Serve with remaining sauce for dipping.
Thursday, October 29, 2009
Monday, October 26, 2009
· 1 package Zatarain's Jambalaya Mix
· 1 package Green Giant brand fake hamburger
· 1/2 - 2/3 of a medium onion, chopped
· Badia Louisiana Hot spice.
· 2-3 cloves garlic, grated.
· Olive oil
Prepare the Jambalaya mix as per directions. Add some Louisiana Hot Sauce to the water when it comes to a boil.
Put oil in frying pan and heat, add garlic and sauté 'till fragrant. Add onions and spice. Sauté' until done. Add fake hamburger and cover with hot spice. Stir 'till the fake hamburger is hot.
When Jambalaya is done add to the hamburger/onion mix. Mix and eat. This recipe is simple and relatively quick.
Saturday, October 24, 2009
Well, I had (in all) 9 spoonfuls of wheat spaghetti and ground beef with tomato sauce and spinach. My drink of choice H2O!!! Yay Me!!!!!! I did have a cup of coffee (and yes it was no sugar, but full of the treacherous french vanilla creamer, yum!...I mean, I know it was a bad choice; I'm gonna have to get into a creamers anonymous program!)
So tomorrow is another day. I'm gonna keep trying the video until I get it. I think after the holidays I will try the lemonade diet. I already have the stuff, so I might as well, right? I will keep you posted!
Friday, October 23, 2009
Thursday, October 22, 2009
I realize that the portion of my weight that is emotional is due to abandonment issues. I have parents who don't love me the way I want them to love me, but they love me with everything they have. It would be nice if this were actually factual. I have sat on the side lines as my mother's youngest child and my father's oldest and watched them both extend themselves for others. I've watched them extend themselves for "adopted" children, natural siblings and godchildren. There never seemed to be enough of them for me. In my attempt to make them happy, I never complained much...I waited in a waiting room to be treated by with their love.
Their love, in the way I needed it. In the way they were capable (as I saw them doing what I needed for other people). While I waited, I got to experience the endorphins that are released in the brain when you eat food to "bandade your pain." I have always been thick, but the moment I decided to become a mother (another attempt to find the "love" that eluded me)my weight ballooned. It wasn't successful. The connection between my son and I is undeniable, but the moment my mother laid eyes on him, she became his. She gave Elijah a double portion of everything (including what she hadn't given me).Meanwhile, food and PCOS were wreaking havoc on my body.
Regardless of how I silently abhorred my parents treatment of me (my father was notorius for 5-minute phone parenting), I fell into the same pattern. I gave up the reigns of parenting to my mother (more like she took them). I fell for men who were either my mother or my father. They were verbally abusive or workaholics. The one thing that was always present, the one thing that never let me down...was food. The problem? It blew me up.
It begins here. I am working on myself right now. I am facing me - sans their love and support. Your parents will leave, your siblings will go, your children also....but you are always with yourself. I am now telling myself how loved I am by myself. Time to take myself out. Spend time alone. See the things I love about ME. I have someone in my life...like daddy he is a workaholic, but I have got to be enough, even in his absence.
I have also been getting my rest. I slept last night, and I am going back to bed for like an hour. I am still sleepy.